Are You Kamphey Approved?

Among the Internationals

Met a nice ad designer on my flight from Atlanta to LAX.  Arrived at LAX and followed a Chinese Man to the international terminal.  He arrived at China Airlines.  I was supposed to be at Air China in Terminal 2.  I tell a desk agent I believe I’ve made a terrible mistake.  “yes, yes you have” she responds.

Apparently I was in the unnumbered international terminal.  How could I have known that since there was no number?  After bidding my friends farewell and traipsing 1/3 of the way around the airport, I had to again travel another 1/3 of the airport to get to Terminal 2, an actual number with actual signs.  Of course everything would have been fine if I had looked at a map and seen that Terminal 2 was just a little jaunt across the parking lot and not around the entire 6 acre parking garage situated smack dab in the middle of this monstrosity of an  Airport.  But I would have also been one story short this early morning.

Found out that the dial on my wrist watch has rusted shut and I am no longer able to change time.  But this works out well since Mongolia will be 12 hours different, so my watch will be correct when I arrive.  Right now between it being 3:30 am or 12:30 am if I did my math right, and sniffling with hay fever, I can’t do my math very well and can’t figure out if I”m an hour early or an hour late to the terminal.  I feel like I’m at a casino. (as in this place is noisy and has no clocks).

only way to travel

It’s a reality.  I’ve finally arrived at the airport, got through security in 10 minutes and have just an hour to wait to board the first leg of the trip.  Tampa, FL to Atlanta, GA. Arriving at the airport I wrote down a few of the Last things I did in America in my new trusty Field Notes.  Don’t worry, I’m not leaving for good, as I’ve said don’t know when I’m coming back, 6 months, 12 months, 3 months? Follow along and find out.

Last Extended Family Seen: Grandma and Grandpa Trow.

Last American Theme Park:  a day at Busch Gardens.  Florida is way too hot to do anything during the day.  Even the water wasn’t cool enough to cool us down.  The water mostly smelled old.  Along with Elephant Dung and my own sweat, you can imagine the amazing time my nostrils had.

Last Letter Mailed:  To Genevieve Beller, Had to repay the quarters I forgot to give back to her after the day at Busch Gardens.

Last Meal:  Applebee’s,  A good ole American heart stopping A1 Smokehouse Burger that I’m sure will haunt me for the next 28 hours of travel.

Last Phone Call: Aunt Pam.  A few minutes before leaving phone in America.  Note: this was the first time she found out I was going to Mongolia.  And I left the phone on purpose, not accidentally.

Last TV Show Watched: Law & Order,  Watched a random episode on the DVR.

Last Hug: Father Kamphey, the dad not the priest.

2nd to Last Hug: Mama Kamphey, the Mom not the star of Big Mama’s House, Martin Lawrence.

The picture here is of the Kyokushu Tower in the heart of Ulaan Baatar.  I’m still unsure of how many A’s are in the spelling of the capital but will try to find out once I’m there.  Maybe it would better if I stick with UB.   Will you understand if I just say “in UB there is..?” I hope you will because I’m not waiting for  a response before moving on to other topics of discussion.

Near the top on the 15th floor is the office in which I will be working for most of my stay in Mongolia.  Here is the office of BTV.  The tv station I keep telling you I am going to work for.  I have finally located a website of theirs but unfortunately it is in Mongolian.  No use to my English speaking friends.  But go ahead and take a look at the lovely world graphic and some photos of a Mongolian festival.  In actuality I don’t know if it’s a Mongolian festival or even if it’s a festival.  It’s a picture of some sort of ceremony of something in some country. Wonderfully specific, eh?

I have found the Arts Council of Mongolia.  And to my dismay they merely have the Calender of Events for May.  Last checked July 8th. But at least it tells me they have many art galleries, a State Opera and Ballet theater, many clubs, An American Center for Mongolian Studies, the aforementioned Ex-Pat Theater Company is performing Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest. Of course they chose the worst Earnest movie of them all.  Even worse than Ernest goes to Africa and Ernest goes to Splash Mountain, the last one only made for TV and features Ernest becoming a “Splashtranaut.”  That’s almost as bad as my idea for a Blaxplotiation film called Afronauts.

My one night in Chicago proved to be a great escape from the frigid cold shoulder of Michigan.   Before heading back to Florida to accept my fate of world travels I got to high tail it around my favorite city, Chicago.  Meeting up with buddy of all friends and foes alike, Jamison Webb, who has recently been sharing his musings at his own damn blog.

We caught a 7:30 pm showing of Whatever Works. the new woody allen movie I’ve been frothing at the lips to see.  Larry David and Woody Allen, together at last, how could this go wrong?  I was so right.  How could this thing have gone so terribly wrong?  Because nothing was right.  The script was dusted off from decades ago, it shows.  The casting wasn’t special, it shows.  The editing lacked, it shows.  The performances were haphazard at best, it shows.   Larry David had a smirk on his face near the end of nearly every shot.  Even though there was the premise that his character knew we were watching… it didn’t give him the right to not take anything he himself said seriously.  The way the Office works is that they don’t break.  Coming from an improv background I can easily tell when those on stage or on film aren’t into what they are doing.  They don’t necessarily break but they bend.  This was pure breaking.  As Jamison says… it seems that Larry David forgot his lines then remembered half way through.  If you’ve seen any of his stand up you can see that this is a direct result of his way of performing.

Curb Your Enthusiasum gets away with Larry David’s lack of focus because the shots are very tight.  Scenes sometimes take but one or two lines of dialogue.   Woody had Larry doing minutes of monologues and carrying scenes that go from amusement to heart break.  That an actor actually needs to use his skills to get from one place to another.  Larry David hasn’t had to do that.  Even his writing, mainly seinfeld, was sitcom, it wasn’t feature length.   And if you want to go back to his feature length try.  Sour Grapes.  Has anyone seen this film? It’s mediocre at best.  His writing doesn’t allow him to carry on emotional scenes of any degree.  It’s always about the plot.  Too bad Whatever Works had a thin plot at best.  The only thing propelling the story were surprise entrances by characters who would eventually take to the title and theme of the film like moths to their death at the hands of a Zapper.

I say this will all love of Woody Allen.  In fact his latest movies I’ve seen have been wonderful and far better than the last 10 years.  I was very excited over this film and may be why it has fallen so far in mine eyes.   The title seems to be psychic now.  Like he just chose this script out of a pile of whatever.  A bunch of words, works, that just happen to be films in waiting.  “Whatever Works.”   But this film does do one very great thing.  It has given me more energy to write my own works.  My own “Whatever Works.”   It doesn’t matter if they are bad, just that they are done.  That they are your legacy.  We’ll have Woody Allen films for years, decades, after he is gone.  We have MJ songs now for the next few years to not remember MJ with, but to remember his legacy.  To remember the songs he brought us in our youth, teens, 20’s, however old you were when you heard MJ sing. or watch Woody be Woody.