Filed under: Crazy Idea | Tags: documentary, economy, fun, humans, I.O.U.S.A., movies, Puzzle, warren buffett, Wordplay
A slight bend in the road as I delve into tell you my dear reader to go do something TONIGHT! Yes that’s right, I am hoping that this post finds you well and unevented tonight. And I hope that after this brief, I will try to be brief, discussion with myself that you will read, will join me and hundreds more to go see a documentary. Which one? the one in the title of course. I.O.U.S.A. It’s playing in theaters tonight and I think for at least a few days but why tonight? why should I and you or we or us go tonight? because there will also be a live discussion with some people… who? does it matter? it’s not your mother or your brother just jabbering over dinner about the “state of the economy.” Well maybe if your brother is Warren Buffett and in case your mother would be his mother too and you would already know he is talking tonight live.
But you say, I can just watch it on youtube or something if I hear anything good about it? I swear it will be good. Take my word for it. why? Because the director of this documentary that is playing tonight is also the director of my favorite documentary to date. Wordplay.
Oh. I see. But isn’t Wordplay about crossword puzzles, and Mr. Kamphey, you do crossword puzzles. yes I do and I like them even if I’m no good but I used to not do crossword puzzles. I fell in love with crossword puzzles after watching Wordplay. Wordplay isn’t really about crossword puzzles it’s about the people. The human beings who are head over heels for puzzles, any kind of puzzles because they take chaos and find similarities within that chaos that brings to light a new perspective on the world. I created the puzzle at the end of this post just in my spare time in L.A. It gave me something to do and worked a muscle in my brain. It brings together two different words that would have never been together lest they have this odd similarity.
That last sentence and most of that last paragraph didn’t make any sense. I know this. I’m getting very excited about this movie tonight and I had a lot of coffee this afternoon. I’m excited to get to typing out the puzzle that I mentioned that will be at the end of this post for those who want something out of this post even if they don’t go see the documentary tonight and/or if they read this post about two weeks after I post it.
Alright so please go on. Yes so the documentary tonight, I swear, will not be about “the economy.” It will be about the people affected and affecting. I think you’ll get something out of going to see it. It’s a special event, I think the planners had that in mind, that won’t really ever happen again but I’d love to see more like it. I feel like I’m back in the 1940’s and going to the movie theater to also watch the news, like a newsreel. It’s like an old timey thing that has been brought into modern times and uses the never old fashioned sense of humanity. What is so special about humans and why should we care? I sense this post getting out of hand. let’s get to a puzzle.
So this puzzle might be easy, might be hard. get on with it. okay. The answers to the clues will be a two word phrase with the first word starting with a B and the second word being the same word as the first except without a B but sounded out the same. Example: A simpson’s paintings would be Bart’s Arts
Get it? got it. so let’s go:
1. What a savings account person would use to stay in place.
2. A bird barely makes it.
3. When a dog makes a noise it also pukes.
4. A diner that only serves punches.
5. A tea party revolutionary in Texas.
6. When diver’s aren’t sick anymore.
7. A tennis pro’s bodies of water.
8. A sum done wrong.
9. A pain from using the oven.
10. A rich simpson’s character’s fancy vases
This is pushing it a bit:
11. Obama’s store for sedimenatry or lime or moon artifacts
ummm.. answers? If you want the answers then ask for them and I will post them as a comment on here or I’ll just email them to you which ever is easiest for me at the time of you asking me for them. I think if you come up with an answer any answer for them, that’s awesome!
Filed under: Crazy Idea | Tags: , Conan, John August, LA, NYC, scab, Triumph, unions, WGA Strike, workers, writers guild of america, writing
FPotD or Former Person of the Day John August has been keeping us up to date and very well informed of the goings on at the WGA Strike out in L.A. He’s been doing updates every day and also continuing his daily posts where in he answers questions. I’d like to send my support out to him and hope that if you haven’t read much about this strike that you begin with John’s account of it. He has a nice post about why they are striking and of course takes questions so send him one if you’re still in the dark about the whole thing.
I have to say that I used to hate unions and think they were just out for a bigger paycheck. I had this crazy belief that an employer should have some good will towards their employees. Of course I had this crazy belief because my parents were small business owners and they had to be good people and took care of their employees. Profit Profit Profit. Apparently that’s all employers and companies think about. Unions have to exist because an employee won’t be able to negotiate good terms for themselves alone. It’s nigh impossible for a large company or a studio to constantly negotiate. So they send one guy in to do the negotiating and if he can’t get fair wages he tells all of his people to quit their job. So all the writers have quit and they aren’t asking for more. They are asking for the basic extension of their previously agreed to contract. At least John August has me believing that this will all blow over soon enough because it’s so simple.
Well if it doesn’t blow over I know I’ll be driving out to L.A. or N.Y. to write for a late night talk show. yes I would be a scab. I wonder if I’m a good enough writer anyways that they would keep me on pending the end of this strike. Who’s with me? Who wants to car pool with me out to either coast? I’ll take a vote once we’re in the car and we’ll go there. I’ll go for Conan first, I think I could do that. I’ve got a good idea for ya already Conan, “Victory: The Praise Tortoise.” He’s Triumph’s replacement since I guess Triumph is out on the picket lines too.
I’m having a lot of fun lately with Ambigrams. What are they? simply one version is a word that when written can be rotated upside down and still be read. There are some normal words that do this naturally wiht the way letters are structured now. like “dip.” There’s not many but when you force some words to be ambigrams it becomes pure art.
Here is the one I did for myself:
Then there are other ambigrams that I’m having a lot of fun with too. There’s one version that a word is worked into the negative space of another word.
If you can’t read that go head to the master of Ambigram, John Landon’s website and see all the types of ambigrams.
Here’s the one I did for Kamphey Approved, it’s still a work in progress.
Of course with this type of design and typography and lettering there are many many experiments that go by the way side. There are absolute failures and you crank out sketches like you wouldn’t believe. There is no way to get to a final product with these without sketching which is a step I miss alot when working on projects.
When I sit down for a new project I’ll usually just dive right in and figure out from inside by doing it. This forces me to do rudimentary sketches and then think how it’s going to go. Then actually write it out instead of just seeing it in my mind’s eye.
Really great puzzles these ambigrams are. I’m having fun with doing ones that read the same when looked at from outside a window. Also with doing two different words. As if when rotated upside down it doesn’t spell itself out but it’s antonym maybe. like EVIL flipped over would spell GOOD. There’s already a cool one for TRUE and FALSE.
Here’s the article that got me going this weekend on ambigrams. It’s a how to by the master John Langdon.
Here’s a little backstory. If you just want to find out what I’m asking you to do then just skip this paragraph. I was the, I guess you can call it, Executive Producer of a late night live talk show last summer. Zach Huddleston was the host (a la Conan O’Brian). It was a lot of fun and I can’t remember having so much pressure and loving writing. I hate writing. When I write it’s for a good reason or because nobody else is willing to. I also have really enjoyed watching, and writing sketch comedy. It’s been hard though, as there really is no distribution avenues for sketches. There are small sketch shows in Chicago where it’s Improv and Comedy Mecca. There’s the college thing a la TSF and personal groups. But I wanted to send my sketches to an actual place and couldn’t come up with any. Why would I send my sketches to SNL? There seems to be no middle ground. It’s just the low of the low and the best of the best. Either you do your thing for a few people in a coffee shop or you perform on TV for millions. I wanted to try to change that a little bit.
Please think about helping me create a Radio Sketch Comedy Podcast. It doesn’t have a name yet but that’s the idea. Anything you can hear on the radio is up for grabs as far as format. Either songs or talk. I plan on showcasing novelty songs such as the Henry Kissinger version of The Wanderer, or weird covers or funny songs like Flight of the Conchords. I really want sketches. Radio Sketches. even a good recorded Bat (a long form Improv done with the lights out). I also want a name for this thing. The only thing I can think of is the Kamphey Ka-Zone but I really don’t want to use my name in this thing as I feel it’ll be more broad if I take myself out of it. I will be hosting at least the first few podcasts. I will probably have interviews with people as I get into it and start stretching the format. I’d like to start with the basics. Please send me recorded radio sketches and I’ll put them together and make a podcast probably once a month to begin. If you don’t know how to record sound then talk to me and I’ll try to help you out. Or if you know how to record audio and can’t or have an idea that you want me to perform then by all means send me a script and I’ll record it and use it.
I have created a short (12 minutes) test podcast. I can email it to you if you’d like to hear it.
I have read how to create a podcast on iTunes and it looks like fun.
If you want to be a part of this just start making stuff and let me know that your making something so that I can be ready for it. I’ll make a little post around the web when a new episode goes up. There might even be a little website.
For now please comment here if you have an idea for a name for this crazy thing.
you can contact me personally at kamphey@gmail.com to let me know if you’re in.
Thanks!
Filed under: Crazy Idea
Sitcom Pitch
Working Title: Unreliable Tourguides
the Pitch:
A group of friends are all coworkers at a Natural History Museum. One is a Tourguide, oe is a Security Guard, oe is a receptionist, and one is a Carpenter. Regularly their jobs have some type of hilarious situation arise. They all get together after work in the back room and play cards and drink beer.
Pilot Premise: They talk about the movie Night at the Museum and how it would be pretty cool if that actually happened. While on a tour the tourguide is told by one of the patrons that she thinks the caveman laying down in the back just opened his eyes. The tourguide scoffs it off and tells her she probably just saw Night at the Museum.
At night while the friends are playing cards they hear something fall in the main hall. They go out and see that a rack fell and in the hallway they see a person run around a corner.
They follow the person and end up seeing that it’s a caveman. They freak out and think that the museum came alive. They hunt down the Caveman and find out that he’s a homeless man who has been living in the museum for a few months.
They let him stay and he becomes a recurring character in the show.
Other story lines that arise during the Series:
-While giving a tour to school kids, the tourguide loses one.
-They find a hidden room underneath the museum
-The Caveman lets some of his buddies into the museum one night and they trash the place. The Group of friends needs to repair it by morning.
-It’s found out the Carpenter is in love with a history professor who comes in all the time. The friends try to hook them up which produces disaterous results.
-While giving a tour the tourguide has a lady patron with the most horrendous laugh ever. It goes on forever and forever. The friends try to save him from it while the tour goes on. It’s in the style of a Monster movie.
Filed under: Crazy Idea
“Missouri Needs Company”
Possible Uses: Could be a great title for a sketch comedy show. Could be a title for a pretentious book as if written by Dave Eggers. Could be a sketch with the personification of states with Missouri being very needy and/or depressed.
